23 pretentious douchbag superbowl dips

Layered Greek Dip

Did you overhear a bunch of buddies at the office talking about their superbowl party and then you dropped hints until they invited you?  I am sure they waited until the last minute because they are just intimidated that you had sooo many invites.  But lucky for them you chose them but what to bring?!?!? Well I am sure you already know they could benefit from your vast knowledge of wines so just pair that lame wine with some of these terrible dips and you are sure to be the talk of the office Monday morning.

1. Pimento Cheese

 Pimento Cheese

You wouldn’t think cheese + mayo + pickled peppers could ever taste this classy, but oh, it can. Ritz crackers mandatory. Get the recipe.  So what you are telling me is that you took potentially awesome nacho cheese and ruined it.

2. Pizza Fondue

 Pizza Fondue

This is genius-level dip: you cook beef, sauce and seasonings and then melt the cheese right in. Get the recipe. (why not just order a pizza?)

3. Classic French Onion Dip

 French Onion Dip

The French are huge sissy’s who suck at football. Get the recipe.

4. Red Pepper, Walnut & Tahini Dip

 Red Pepper Walnut Tahini
Tom Schierlitz / realsimple.com

Add a little class to the proceedings. Get the recipe. (looks like poop on a cracker)

5. Mexican Volcano Dip

Mexican Volcano Dip

This setup addresses the logistical challenges of an actual layered dip, allowing efficient direct access to the ingredient sector you like the best. Get the recipe.

6. Feta, Honey & Date Spread

Feta Honey and Dates
Dudes you actually want to watch the super bowl with have never heard of these three ingredients.  Get the recipe.

7. Whipped Goat Cheese Herb Dip

 whipped Goat Cheese
Get the recipe. Shut it down – party is officially over when this walks in the door.

8. Pea Pesto

 Pea Pesto

Don’t worry, it looks healthier than it tastes. Get the recipe. Would you honestly feed this to friend?

9. Super Easy Mexican Dip

 Super Easy Mexican Dip

Essentially a bowl of fancy sour cream (are you complaining?) Get the recipe.

10. Pineapple-Black Bean Guacamole

 Pinapple Blackbean Guacamole

Get the recipe. This was probably a big hit at the Pride De Mayo party but so was Ricky Martin.

11. Layered Greek Dip

 Layered Greek Dip

Get the recipe. Aristotle can suck it

12. Simple Black Bean Dip

 simple_black_bean_dip

Get the recipe. Doesn’t look simple or good

13. Creamy Artichoke Spinach Dip

 Spinach Artichoke Dip

Classic for a reason. Get the recipe. Perfect for making any superbowl party into just another crappy trip to TGI Fridays

14. Chili-Sour Cream Dip

 Chilli Sour Cream

If you’ve got a jar of salsa and a container of sour cream, you (yes, you!) can more or less make this dip right now. Get the recipe.

15. Easy, Creamy Homemade Hummus

 Homemade Hummus

Get the recipe.

16. Feta & Sun-Dried Tomato Dip

Feta Sun Dried Tomato

Tang central. Get the recipe.

17. Spicy Avocado Tomatillo Dip

 Spicy Avacado Tomatillo Dip

Get the recipe. This one probably tastes good but you will be a d-bag when you try to say over and over “IT’S NOT GUACAMOLE!!!”

18. Buffalo Wing Hummus

 Buffalo Wing Hummus

Hummus that went to Buffalo and came back with a real attitude. Get the recipe. Also know as the only wrong way to eat a buffalo wing.

19. Smoked Salmon Spread

 Smoked Salmon Spread

It never hurts to try and raise the bar a little. Get the recipe.

20. Spinach & White Bean Dip

 Spinach Whitebean

Get the recipe.

21. Blue Cheese Dip

 Blue Cheese Dip

Get the recipe

22. Lemon Artichoke White Bean Hummus

 Lemmon Artichoke Whitebean

Get the recipe.

23. Edamame-Avocado Dip

 Edamame Avacado

Is it guac? Not quite, but you’re okay with that. Get the recipe.